SportsCliche.com
   IF YOU'RE THE BRONCOS...
                
        
          

This one is used to an irritating excess by announcers doing game analysis. Instead of saying "The Broncos should go for it on fourth and long" or "I think coach Mike Shanahan should punt here" they will instead remark:

"If you're Mike Shanahan, you'll be wanting to punt here."

The analyst often completes the thought with an equally absurd follow-up:

"If I'm the Chiefs, I'm looking for the fake."

Any member of the viewing audience past the age of three will instantly realize they cannot be -- nor will they ever be -- Mike Shanahan, let alone an entire team or organization. If you're a sports announcer it seems, you just don't understand that.

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